We’ve all been there right? Our child showing their most vibrant display of independence and control in front of all.
I remember my son crying horribly at a party because I wouldn’t allow a third piece of cake.
He cried louder than ever. I swear he was doing it for attention. And me being my best mom self let him know that was going to stop — and stop now!
Looking back at my behavior makes me want to cringe.
We are all growing and learning as parents
Here are some tips I wish I could give my younger self:
- Let them have emotions: Let them cry or whine.
- Don’t add to the emotional distress. Try slowly getting quieter, not louder.
- Help emotions have a reason: “I understand. I wouldn’t feel happy if (insert reason for distress here) either.”
- Give a valid reason for your response: “3 pieces of cake is unhealthy. My job is to keep your body as healthy as possible,” or “When you don’t clean your room, I can’t allow you to go to (privilege they are not getting). My job is to teach you responsibility. The (insert your last name here) keep their word/commitments and do hard things. You can get through this.”
I really struggled with adding more explosive emotions to our situation. So I’m repeating this for all my mamas and papas still working on controlling their emotions.
Keep your cool! It really helps your child keep their cool, too.
Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash